My "Rebellious" Heart

In the last few years, I've been questioning a lot of things that I've grown up believing .....things that I've always assumed were good and right and true....things like my traditions and doctrines and beliefs.   Doubts and curiosity have fueled me to research and dig into history for answers in a way that has been anything but drudgery.  My seeking has led me to treasures that flood me with excitement.  While part of me feels a bit uncomfortable with these new "rebellious" thoughts.....another part of me feels energized and refreshed.  I mean, here I am, 50 years old, and I'm nobody's little girl.  If I'm not gonna be honest with who I am by now, then what am I?  If I can't be strong enough to live what I believe, then what does that make me? 

In revealing my heartfelt questions of faith, my guess is that these queries are probably not mine alone.  Perhaps you've shared some of my questions a time or two.  I have a hunch that I'm voicing those fleeting thoughts that get suppressed or ignored, because they're too big and too uncomfortable.  Perhaps some of my questions are uncomfortable for you.  I understand.  I'm sorry.....I really am.....I've been there too.  I realize that such honesty is risky.....but I'm not going to be a wimp or a pleaser.  I've decided to say what I need to say.

I believe God's Word contains the answers to my questions.  I believe my Heavenly Father welcomes my honest heart.  I believe that there is a consistency and a connecting thread running throughout the Scriptures that doesn't change.....because God doesn't change.....He knows the end from the beginning.  I believe the Old Testament isn't really old and the New Testament isn't really new.....to God.  They are linked harmoniously together as God's enduring Word.....a continuous revelation.....the love story of a persistent, faithful Lover set upon the wooing of his Bride.

As Noah, Abraham, Moses and the disciples, each one of us must answer God's call on our lives.  His call requires us to leave behind our past and go to our destiny.  We can't rely on what others around us are doing, our journeys are not the same.  We can't even compare our life's journey to our parents' journey.  Our warm memories and the cherished traditions that shaped us are not reason enough for us to refuse to move forward when He calls.  This is a new day.....a new season.....a new time of history.....in His Story. 

 

 My 50 Questions.....????? 

.....our relationship with Israel.....holidays and holy days.....
.....following Jesus.....our relationship to the law..... 
.....the trustworthiness of God's Word..... 
.....the roots of the church.....deception of the enemy.....

1. Why have I grown up with so little focus on Israel's importance for today?
2. Does the church think she has replaced Israel?
3. Do we think God has rescinded on His promises to Israel?
4. What assurance does a Gentile believer have in God's promises, if God is not even faithful to his chosen people?
5. Is it honorable for the church to call Jews away from the biblical .....Sabbath and other God-appointed holy days.....days God commanded them to keep forever?
6. Is it right for the church to call Jews to pagan originated "Christian" holidays that Jesus/Yeshua never kept?
7. Why don't we recognize the fullness of Jesus/Yeshua's Jewishness?
8. Why don't we call Jesus by his prophetic, God-given name?  Yeshua means "the LORD saves".....how cool is that?!
9. Why do we celebrate Messiah's birth in December when we know the season is incorrect?
10. Why do we celebrate our Savior's birth and resurrection on the same day as pagan holidays?
11.  Are Christian holidays really holy days in God's sight?
12. What do Christmas trees have to do with the birth of the Savior of the world?
13. Advent.....after all these years I still can't remember how the pink and purple candles fit in or what each Sunday is supposed to signify.....why is it so nebulous?
14. Do our unbiblical holidays really honor God?
15. Why don't we celebrate biblical holy days, the days called calls "his appointed times"  or "his divine appointments?"
16. Lent.....what does Christ's 40-day wilderness experience have to do with Easter?
17. Why do we celebrate the Lord's Supper with leavened bread?
18. Why don't we celebrate the Passover with unleavened bread as our Lord taught us to do in remembrance of him? 
19. Why do we celebrate our resurrected Rabbi by eating ham at Easter?
20. WWJD - how about instead.....What Did Jesus Do?  If we consider ourselves to be disciples/followers of Jesus, why don't we do what he did?
21. Why do we worship on Sunday and call it the Sabbath day?
22. Who gave the Roman Catholic Church the right to outlaw Sabbath worship and order Sunday worship?
23. How can we discount the words God gave to Moses face-to-face.....words that God wrote in stone.....with His own finger?
24. Since Jesus kept the Sabbath along with his followers, shouldn't we do the same?
25. Since Jesus said he did not come to abolish the law, should we not esteem and follow it also?
26. Does God mean what He says?
27. Isn't God's Word eternal?
28. Why do we consider the law to be negative?
29. Would God do away with His law that David proclaims as perfect, trustworthy, right, radiant, pure, firm, righteous, invaluable, sweet, in Psalm 19?  
30. If the law is done away with, why does Paul call it "holy, righteous and good?"
31. If we believe that the New Covenant has replaced the Old Covenants, why do we still trust God's covenant sign of the rainbow?
32. Why do we consider the Reformers to be our church fathers?
33. Why don't we consider Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and the disciples of Jesus to be our church fathers?
34. Shouldn't we be more Reformed.....as in formed to be more like the early church than the Roman Catholic Church? 
35. Why do we nearly idolize the Reformers, like Martin Luther and John Calvin who were anti-Semitic? - see Anti-Semitism of the "Church Fathers"
36. How can one love God and hate his chosen people Israel?
37. How could a truly holy church commit atrocities against people with whom they disagree?  
38. Who gave the Roman Catholic Church the right to change God's laws, times and customs?
39. Does it matter to God that the Roman Catholic Church merged the pagan with the holy to create new holidays?
40. When God is patient, does that also mean he is approving?
41. Who gave the Roman Catholic Church the right to outlaw biblical Jewish practices?
42. Why do we practice the same holidays that the Roman Catholic Church instituted?
43. Why does the Protestant church resemble the Roman Catholic Church, more closely than the early church?
44. Why is the Vatican filled with such pomp, power and riches?
45. Why does the Vatican collect and display pagan and naked art?
46. Where did God ever say that (infant) baptism replaced circumcision?
47. How does infant baptism embrace the reality of repentance and rebirth?
48. Is it possible that the enemy of God has infiltrated the church with his schemes?  
49. Is there not an enemy who seeks to oppose, to steal, kill and destroy what belongs to God?  Who seeks to deceive even the elect? 
50. Can we as a church be humble enough to admit that perhaps we have been deceived, and that the enemy has divided us from one another and from our Jewish roots? 

So, do all these challenging words make me a rebel-rouser?  I hope not.  

The way I see it, I'm just a seeker of Truth and a fellow pilgrim on life's journey.

The Day draws near.....the Bridegroom is returning soon, and we must prepare.....pure and spotless as a bride, we must be.  When the shofar blows we must be ready.  Let us go when God calls.....let us walk by faith.....not by sight.  The journey is life-long, sometimes difficult and lonely, but it is worthy and worthwhile and totally worth it.